For Just a Moment
by TheLostWoods
Summary: Berwald Oxenstierna has seen his fair share of tragedy, and when he is forced to leave his home in Sweden, along side his sickly mother, things quickly become worse. The only light in Berwald's dark, lonely world is that of Tino Vainamoinen, whom he meets his first day of school. Berwald quickly falls for Tino's beauty and kindness, but will those feelings ever be returned?
1. Chapter 1

For starters, I've never been much of a people person. That is to say, as soon as they see me, they tend to turn and go the opposite direction. I've been told that I have a frightening glare. It's not that I'm angry or anything, I just have really bad eyesight and I find myself always straining to see. I guess that comes off intimidating. Considering this, I haven't been able to make many friends. Leaving my home country of Sweden and moving halfway across the world didn't exactly help either.

My mom announced suddenly that we would be leaving right before I was to begin my second year elementary school, putting me around 8 years old; I was a year older than most of the kids in my class. Looking back, I guess that might have contributed to the fact that they were all terrified of me. My childhood was a lonely one, but I tried not to let it bother me that much. My mother was always very supportive of me, as well as being very loving.

So there I was, a large, practically blind, soft spoken, awkward Swede with an intimidating stare, desperately trying to adjust to the new atmosphere I found myself in. My first day of 2nd grade was approaching, and I was terrified. It was already two weeks into the year, so I had already missed the crucial first day where seats were chosen and friends were made. I was not excited, but I put on a brave face for my mother.

She had always been very frail and sickly, but after my father abandoned her when she discovered she was pregnant, she promised herself that she would be strong for me. And I knew that she was putting on a brave face everyday for by sake, so I would try my best to return that kindness. I was glad when she decided to take her own health into consideration by choosing to move away, so I did my best not to complain about it. I only wanted her to be happy and healthy. I loved her very much.

"Berwald, ya re'dy ta go? I's tim' ta l'eve," she announced in her thick Swedish accent. I simply nodded in response. She smiled at me, defining the thin wrinkles forming around her eyes, and ruffled my hair a bit.

"Y'll be f'ne. Ahm s're y'll be m'kin fr'nds n'no tim'." I simply nodded again as she led me to the car. The ride to my new school took about 10 minutes to complete. My mother would have slight coughing fits periodically the whole way, but she assured me that she was fine. I knew better, but decided to let my concern remain silent, like most everything else I thought or felt.

She pulled up to the front of the school and we both got out. As we entered the building, we were greeted by a kind-looking, gray-haired woman.

"Can I help you?" She asked as we approached. My mother explained, I assumed, who I was and that I was going to be attending there starting today, but I wasn't really paying attention to what she was saying. I was completely enthralled with the person who had just walked in.

At first, I'll admit, I thought it was a girl, considering they were the most beautiful person I had ever seen, besides my own mother. Their light blond hair shimmered slightly under the artificial lights of the school, but what had me so infatuated was their eyes. They were the biggest, roundest, loveliest eyes, encircled with a thick framing of dark eyelashes, deep violet irises sparkling like cups if fine wine. My heart skipped a beat as she approached. Only it wasn't a she.

"Good morning, Tino!" the gray-haired woman greeted.

The blonde boy flashed a glistening white smile in response. I could feel my face warm slightly. He quickly scurried down the hall, clinging to the strap of his backpack as he ran.

"Well, Ms. Oxenstierna was it?" my mother nodded, "everything is ready to go! Berwald's class is just down the hall." The gray-haired woman gestured behind her, the same direction the blonde boy had run a moment ago.

"Th'nk y' so m'ch," my mother replied. She took my hand and we walked down the hallway together.

The walls were a light, dusty blue color, the same as my mother's eyes, I noted. Various crayon drawings were strung from a piece of twine that hung across the wall. My mother squeezed my hand.

"H're we 're," she said, stopping in front of the door to my class. She dropped my hand and got on her knees to be eye-level with me. She placed one hand on my cheek and smiled.

"Ah kn'w y'll h've a gr'at day." She kissed my head gently. I saw faint traces of tears in the corners of her eyes "Jag älskar dig, Berwald." With that she turned and began down the hall again, coughing at various moments.

I took a deep breath before entering my classroom. It was bigger than the one I was in back home, I thought, and it had a nice, warm aroma to it. I could already feel my wariness beginning to melt away. The teacher greeted me almost immediately.

"Ah!" she exclaimed. "You must be the new student," she looked at the paper in her hands,". Oxensteer... Um Oxensty... I'm sorry, I'm not quite sure how to pronounce this."

"Berwald Oxenstierna," I said bluntly. I noticed she flinched a bit when I looked up at her. Already people were beginning to judge me on my apparently frightening appearance. I sighed quietly.

"Alright then, Barweld," she said, completely messing up the pronunciation of my name, "feel free to sit wherever you want, okay? Class will begin in a moment." She smiled nervously. I nodded and picked a seat in the back.

For the most part, I didn't bother looking at anyone in my class. I knew they'd only get scared and run away just like everyone else, so what was the point? The bell rang then, signaling the beginning of the school day. The teacher took her place at the front of the class.

"Good morning, everyone! Before I take attendance, as you might have already noticed, we have a new student with us today! He just moved here from Sweden, and I'd like us all to get to know him a little better. Barweld, will you please stand up and introduce yourself?"

I got to my feet, towering over the other students greatly, I was sure. I fixed my eyes on a point on my desk, and I refused to move my gaze from it.

"Ja, Ah 'm Berwald. Ah 'm fr'm Sweden." I sat down, satisfied enough.  
As I had suspected, they started talking. "Why does he talk funny?" "Why does he look so angry?" "He's scary... Lets not talk to him." Their comments hurt, but, honestly, by that point I was used to it. I slumped back in my chair, continuing to look down.

"Quiet down!" the teacher demanded. "Thank you Barweld. I will take roll now." She continued for a while, calling out various names to check the attendance status associated with each. I didn't pay much attention, that is, until she called out one specific name that I recognized.

"Tino Väinäimöinen?" she called.

"Here!" I turned in the direction of the small, energetic voice, and sure enough, it belonged to the beautiful blonde boy I had seen that morning. My heart race increased, I was immensely excited that he was in my class.  
When he noticed my looking in his direction, he turned away quickly. It stung that he too seemed to be afraid of me already. I looked back down at my desk. I could already tell that this was going to be the worst day of my life. It so happens I was right, but it was not so traumatizing for the reasons I though it would be.

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**A/N: Hello, everyone! Alright, this is my first attempt at a SuFin fanfic, so I ask that you just politely bear with me while I try and figure this all out. And I'll tell you, Swedish accents are not the easiest to try to write, so bear with me there as well. Quick translation note, "Jag älskar dig" means "I love you" in Swedish. Okay, I don't really have anything else to say. Until next time!**


	2. Chapter 2

So far, my first day of school was not going well. I could tell, by the way they were all completely ignoring me and refusing to look my way, that my classmates were terrified of me. All through lunch, recess, and every class, I was completely alone. I desperately hoped that someone would talk to me, and I couldn't understand why I had to be this way. I wished I could be like that blonde boy, Tino.  
He was always smiling, always making friends. I wished I could be like that: small, friendly, happy, beautiful... But I knew deep down that I was cursed to be alone. I had accepted that long ago, and I knew that was the way it was.

The bell rang, signaling the end of the day. I gathered my things and made my way out of the class room. Again, the other kids in the hall would quickly head the other direction as I approached. I even made a silvery-blonde-haired 1st grader cry. I had never wanted to disappear so much in my life. I kept my head down until I found myself at the entrance of the school.  
I stepped into the hot August air, breathing it in through my nose. I was enjoying the warmth, but it would take a while to become accustomed to it. I sighed as the school yard became more and more empty.

My mother said she would come pick me up, right? I glanced down at the watch around my wrist. School had let out over 45 minutes ago. I was certain that any moment she would come driving up, smiling and offering me a big hug. She would kiss my head and ask how my day went. She would tell me not to worry about the other kids, and tell me to continue being myself and they were learn to like me for that. Any moment now. Any moment...

My mother never showed up that day. She would not be there to hug or kiss me. She would not be there smile and tell me that she loved me. She would never be there to do these things again.

"Berwald Oxenstierna?" I recognized the gray-haired woman from this morning. I grunted in response, wary of the distressed look upon her face.  
"I'm going to need you to come inside with me. Something... Something happened. I'm very sorry..." She placed and hand on my shoulder and led me inside where a police officer was waiting. My mother was... My mother...

I ran as fast as I could. It wasn't true, there's no way it could be true. I had just seen her that morning. She had held me, kissed me, spoke to me only a few hours ago. I ran, not knowing particularly where I was going, I just knew I couldn't stay here. I wanted to go home, I wanted to go back to Sweden. I wanted my mother...  
After sprinting for who knows how long, I found myself in a small park. It wasn't the nicest, best looking area by any means, but it was relatively clean and contained a sturdy looking playground, which I made my way over to. I collapsed in the wood-chipped terrain that covered the entirety of the play area.

Nothing made sense anymore. I didn't understand why I deserved this. I really was cursed to be alone. I cried that day, for the first time in my life. My eyes stung and my nose ran, but I didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore. I sat in that park, crying in the dirt, for God knows how long. Hours, days, I don't know. I simply sat there and wept.  
I didn't want anyone to see me like this. I promise myself that I couldn't be weak. I'd never let anyone see these bitter tears of fear as the ran from my eyes.

"Um," a small voice piped, "e-excuse me..."  
I jumped slightly and wiped off my face- unsuccessfully, considering that my hands were filthy- and turned to face the person who had called out to me.

"You're Berwald, r-right?" Tino asked, a slight hint of fear in his voice, but a lot less than I was expected. My cheeks flushed and I nodded.

"I... I just heard about your mama... How she's in the hospital and all... The police are out looking really hard for you, they came to all of our- um you know, your classmates- they came to our houses looking for you." He bent down, his pale face inches from mine, and he wiped the dirt and salty tears from my cheeks.

"You are all dirty, Su-San!" he chuckled. "Can I call you that? It's just that your name is strange and it's kind of hard to pronounce and I figured since you're from Sweden that 'Su' would work. You know, Su-wee-den? Does that make sense? But that by itself sounds kinda silly, so I added the 'san.' My friend Kiku- he's Japanese and he's in our class- he said that its an honorific, or something like that, in his language. I thought that was kind of cool. So I'm going to call you Su-San!" I blinked at him. "I-I'm sorry! Sometimes I start talking an I just start rambling. It's a really bad habit. And I'm doing it again. Sorry."

"'Sokay," I replied, sniffling a bit. "Ya c'n c'll meh wha'v'r ya w'nt."  
He smiled at me again. It was a breathtaking, white smile. It tugged at my heart, that was for sure.

Tino stood up and offered me his hand. "Come on, Su-San. Let's go." I gladly grasped his outstretched hand, and he pulled me into a hug.

"It will be okay, Su-San." He released me and flashed that smile again, an I really believed that everything would be alright.

He held my hand as we walked to the hospital together. He would occasionally look back and smile at me, causing me to blush just a bit. He told me about his family; how they had moved from Finland shortly after he was born, so he didn't remember it very well.

"Fin," I said. He looked back at me with a puzzled look.

"Huh?"

"Ah'm g'nna c'll ya Fin, c'se ya'r F'nnish."

He smiled and giggled, a sound like small, gentle bells. "Okay, then! You're Su-San, and I'm Fin!" He continued to pull me along, grasping my hand firmly, but still somehow softly.

"I'm sorry, Su-San," he piped after a silence. I grunted in response. (I've mentioned that I'm not good with people.) "I'm sorry I didn't talk to you at school today. I-" he paused, and I noticed the tips of his ears getting a bit red, "I was a little afraid." He gasped. "I mean, t-that's not really what I meant... I'm sorry..." he apologized again.

I squeezed his hand a bit. "'Sokay, Fin. M'st 're 'fraid a me. Ah'm used ta it."

He stopped walking for a moment; he looked like he wanted to say something, but decided against it. We continued on, his hand clutching mine just a bit tighter. I hoped he couldn't feel how fast my heart was beating.

"Let's hurry, Su-San," he said finally. "For your Mama."

Secretly, I thought that if someone had to see me so fragile and broken, I'm glad it was him.

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**A/N: yeah, not the greatest chapter, cause I had some problems figuring out how I wanted to do this. So I hope it didn't suck to horribly bad. Thanks for reading, everyone~**


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